On Being a Mom...

My niece, who is a new mommy, recently had a post on her Facebook page that read, "The next person who says that being a stay-at-home mom is easy is going to get punched in the face. With a hammer."

I couldn't help but laugh.  I  remember those early baby & preschool days and just how draining they were!  Even now, there are days when my children, precious though they are, take everything I have...and maybe a little more.  (Being a parent is definitely not for the fainthearted.) 

My little blessings have actually had the nerve to say to me, more than once lately, "You don't work; you stay at home.  You just do nothing all day."  Uhm. Hello???  They clearly have no idea that the words "mother" and "work" are synonyms. Who helps them with their homework, shops for the groceries, cooks their dinner, empties the dishwasher, and picks up the dirty socks they left on the floor for the millionth time??  Do they think there is a household fairy who washes/dries/folds their clothes, vacuums the house, mops the floor, packs the lunches, organizes the closets, shops for their clothes/school supplies/friend's birthday parties/teacher appreciation gifts, wraps the presents, bakes cupcakes for the class party, hems the dresses, plans the play dates, makes the appointments, takes the dog to the vet, pumps the gas, returns the library books,  deposits the checks, mails the packages and pays (at least some) of the bills??  Have they ever considered the amount of time spent driving them to and from Awanas, baseball practice, tech club, jump rope club, the playground, the library...never mind listening to way too many practices for the upcoming talent show, speech contest and science fair project presentation?  Grrh...

I honestly don't know how full-time working mommy's do it; they are my heroes & get the utmost respect.  Being a mom is hard enough, never mind having two jobs!  But working women cannot do what they do in a bubble, and those of us who don't work are often called upon to "stand in the gap" when there is a teacher planning day, school field trip or work-related crisis.  We are the ones who work our tails off for free on school-wide PTO events and classroom parties, send continual reminders to working parents who always forget to send the money in, and work on literacy and comprehension skills with each child, one-on-one.  We are the ones who are called over the summer when there's been a glitch in the day camp schedule...  (I may soon be one of those moms myself, as finances get tighter and thoughts of college are starting to loom large!)

But working one job or two -- we moms (and dads) do what we have to do.  And we wouldn't trade our kids for the world.  Still, I have to admit I'm really looking forward to the day when my grown kids become parents themselves.  I'm smiling to myself just thinking about the first time I hear one of my kids say, "Mom, I'm so tired.  The kids were sick, and I didn't get any sleep...  This parenting thing is exhausting."  I'll smile sweetly and say, "Well, you know, dear, it's not as easy as it looks. Bye, now, it's time for my Bridge game." 

Thoughts on the Chick-Fil-A Controversy

 Wow!  These past couple of weeks on Facebook have been interesting.  I have read posts that have encouraged me, frustrated me, angered me and challenged me.  I've spoken out at certain times, and decided it was best to be quiet other times.  But since I dislike having my intentions misunderstood, here's why I chose to support CHICK-FIL-A Appreciation Day on August 1st:

1.  Any Christian worth his/her salt would agree with Dan Cathy's statement:  "I think we are inviting God's judgment on our nation when we shake our fist at Him and say, 'We know better than you as to what constitutes a marriage".  As Christians, we are commanded - not just encouraged - but commanded to base our morality on the Bible.  It is the standard for Truth, which does not changed with the passing of time or popular opinions of society.  It may appear to be old-fashioned, critical, judgmental, unloving, unfair, bigotry, etc., etc.  But it is what it is, and Dan Cathy has a RIGHT to believe what does.


2.  Freedom of speech is part of the American constitution.  Nobody (not even vocal groups claiming discrimination) has the right to take that away.  We all agree that some things that are said are hurtful; some things are downright "hate speech" (although I do NOT think Dan Cathy was being hateful).  But whether we agree or like what someone has said or not, unless we want to re-write the constitution...it is still supposed to be a right!  Dan Cathy has the RIGHT to say what he said.

I understand the hostility & hurt feelings that come out of the situation.  But sometimes people need to take a step back, and use logic rather than just reacting on their feelings.  It is what it is, and not everything is a personal attack!  Having said, that, I do understand why some homosexuals may feel attacked by some Christians.  Not all of us are like that.  I have known homosexuals that I have liked very much; they are not lesser people because of their sexual orientation.

Having said that, I believe homosexuality is a sin because the Bible says it is a sin.  You can say, "I was born this way, I can't help it,", etc.  But people say that about any number of things, and if God calls it "sin", He promises a way out.  (I Cor. 10:13 - "No temptation has overtaken you but what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.  But...will provide a way out.")  Yes, it's easy for me to say.  Do I know what it's like to be gay or struggle with homosexual tendencies?  No! I would never presume to know that.  But what I DO know is that we all have struggles.  Our struggles may be different in kind or degree, but we all have them.  Homosexuality is no more sin than lying, cheating, stealing, premarital sex, adultery, gossip...and a million other sins that are more "acceptable" in Christian circles.  Sin is sin, and "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." Romans 3:23

The good news is that we have a God who knows all about it, and He still loves each and every one of us.  Gay or straight.   

Blessings

What if Your blessings come through raindrops?

What if Your healing comes through tears?

What if a thousand sleepness nights are what it takes to know Your near?

What if my greatest disappointments, or the aching of this life

Are a revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy?

What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise?

Trusting in God's Plan

 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD.  As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts." - Isaiah 55:8-9

One of my favorite memories is driving around our Mandarin neighborhood one December taking in the Christmas lights with my then-3-year-old son.

"Look, mommy!" he kept saying excitedly, "How beautiful!"  He was so enthralled by even the simplest light display.

I looked back and smiled at my blond-haired wonder.  I was amazed by the love I felt for this little person.  Just a short while back, in my pregnancy days, I was fairly confident I didn't really want a little boy.

My husband and I already had a much-anticipated daughter, and I preferred another girl.  After all, my daughter was eager for a female playmate, I was set with clothes and toys, and it just seemed ideal.  Besides, in my experience, little boys were loud, rambunctious and . . . well . . . foreign.  I grew up with sisters.  I knew nothing about little boys, and I wasn't that eager to learn.

But God had a different plan in mind.  When it the time came for my ultrasound, the doctor asked, "Do you think it's a girl or boy?"

"Girl," I answered.
"No, it's a boy."
"Are you sure?" I asked in disbelief.
"I wanted a sister," my daughter said flatly.  At least my husband was excited.

Thank goodness, my daughter and I warmed up to the idea of a boy before Caleb Scott made his grand entrance into the world.  But never in a million years could I have predicted the joy I would experience mothering my little boy!  He is charming, bright, and sensitive.  He is wise beyond his years, and already a heart for God.  Sure, he can be a bit rambunctious at times, but he he also keeps us in stitches. Yes, his obsession with construction equipment is a mystery to me, but I appreciate his boundless enthusiasm.  He truly makes our family complete, and I can't imagine our lives without him.

I marvel that God, in his infinite wisdom, saw what I could not see.  He blessed me with an exquisite gift I didn't ask for and didn't know I wanted.  How good He is to us!  And what a reminder that He sees beyond what we can see, and we an trust Him with all the details of our lives.

You Alone are God

There comes a place in the life of every believer when you have to decide if your faith is real or it's all for naught.  When you have to decide if you will test God, see if His Word is true or if it's just a bunch of platitudes designed as a crutch, to help weak people "feel good".  There are times when you look to heaven and say, "God I DON'T GET IT:  if you are completely loving & all-powerful, as you say you are, then why so much pain in the world???  Why are little children molested or murdered in the womb?  Why do people suffer horrible drowning deaths in tsunamis and lose everything in natural disasters?  Why do good people suffer through illness?  Why are there continual struggles in my family's life, when my husband & I have desired to serve You?  Why do the blessings seem to often come to the ungodly, and the trials to the godly? I know Your Word says to expect trials, God...but HOW are you using these difficulties for YOUR GLORY?  If only I understood...then it would be easier to let you 'have thine own way, Lord'...  And yet...You alone are God.  'The secret things belong to you' (Deut. 29:29) and Your ways are not my ways (Isaiah 55:8).   I don't understand, but I humbly confess my pride, choosing not to trust in my limited vision, but put my trust in Your character.

For me, today is that day.  I am tired of worrying of all I cannot control.  Bad things happen; good things happen, too.  God is either who He claims to be or He is not.  So I am putting Him to the test, once again.  I do not know what tomorrow will bring: if my husband will get a job using his skills, if we will get out of a rut financially, if I will get answers or healing of my illness, if my children will stay on a good path, if we will find the true biblical community we desire...if life on this earth will ever "make sense".  But I do intend to find out that God is faithful, and not just in the Bible, or in some other person's testimony...but in my story...my life, my family, my friends, my sphere of influence... Today I acknowledge just how small I am, and give it all back to Him..